Missing Pdx

I've been missin my hometown a lot these days. Here's a few things I miss.

The Multnomah county Library- Downtown

My family and friends

View of Mt. hood

Going to Mt. Tabor

Walking around the streets singing to myself

Ole Ole mexican restuarant

The rain

Forest Park

Downtown

Going to the beach- Rockaway

The environment

I believe that I live in one of the best cities in the world. I feel sometimes I will never get away, and most of the time I'm trying but I realized this will always be my home so go explore. I haveve still, never managed to be gone for more than 2 months. This trip to japan has been interesting. I've learned a lot about myself and family. I've began to build the fire again and it feels good. Thanks the person who got me laughing and introduced me to the world again, even If you don't realize it. Thanks. To am mystery woman, who I find incredible smart no matter her opinion. I don't know you well but someday you'll know me.

Please keep our oceans clean and stop cutting our forest, we need them for our survival, since they produce oxygen, and help maintain the micro-ecosystem.

KEEP OREGON GREEN!

of course keep the planet green!

Stolen Question

Stolen from ominiverse

Q: How Many Bush Administration Officials Does It Take To Screw In A Light Bulb?


A: None. There is nothing wrong with the light bulb; its conditions are improving every day. Any reports of its lack of incandescence are malicious spin from the liberal media. That light bulb has served honorably and anything you say undermines the lighting effect. Why do you hate freedom?

Driving Lessons

Yes, I don't know how to drive. It has come to be that the only way for me to get driving lessons from my aunt is to become a church dweller. I never got my permit renewed, before I came here so that cause some problems also. But she will still take me only if I go to church. AM i willing to take on this challenge? Somewhat, I just want to learn how to drive. I'm willing to partake in godliness.

But, dang!

Makeshift Patriot

Makeshift Patriot
The flag shop is out of stock
I hang myself at half-mast

Makeshift Patriot
The flag shop is out of stock
I hang myself at half-mast

Makeshift Patriot
The flag shop is out of stock
I hang myself at half-mast

It's the Makeshift, The Patriot
The flag shop is out of stock
I hang myself ... via live telecast

Coming live from my own funeral
Beautiful weather off at a nice shine
Which is suitable for a full view of a forever altered skyline
When times like these arise, I freestyle biased opinions every other sentence
Journalist ethics slip when I pass them off as objective
"Don't give me that ethical shit"
I've got exclusive, explicit images to present to impressionable American kids
And it's time to show this world how big our edifice is!

That's exactly what they attacked when a typically dark skinned disney villain...
Used civillians against civilians and charged the trojan horses into our building

Using commercial aviation as instruments of destruction
Pregnant women couldn't protect their children
Wheelchairs were stairway obstructions

Now I have to backpedal
From the shower of glass and metal...
Wondering how after it settles,
We'll find who provided power to radical rebels

The Melting Pot seems to be calling the kettle black when it boils over
But only on our own soil so the little boy holds a toy soldier
And waits for the suit and tie to come home,
We won't wait 'til he's older
before we destroy hopes for a colder war to end...
"Now get a close-up of his head"

Makeshift Patriot
The flag shop is out of stock
I hang myself at half-mast

"How does my hair look"

Makeshift Patriot
The flag shop is out of stock
I hang myself at half-mast

"Run that tape back"

Makeshift Patriot
The flag shop is out of stock
I hang myself at half-mast

"It looks just like a movie"

It's the Makeshift, The Patriot
The flag shop is out of stock
I hang myself ... While the stock markets crash.

The city is covered in inches of muck
I see some other pictures of victims are up
Grieving mothers are thinking their children are stuck
Leaping lovers are making decisions to jump
While holding hands ... To escape the brutal heat
Sometimes in groups of three
The fallout was far beyond the toxic couds where people look like debris.
But all they saw, after all was said...
Beyond the talking heads was the bloody dust with legs, looking like the walking dead calling for meds

But all the hospitals are overwhelmed
Volunteers need to go the hell home
Moments of silence for firefighters were interrupted by cell phones

Who's gonna make that call, to increase an unknown death toll?
It's the one we rally behind.
He's got a megaphone, and he's promising to make heads roll.
So we cheer him on, but asbestos is affecting our breath control
The less that we know, the more they fabricate
The easier it is to sell souls

"There is a new price on freedom,
so buy into it while supplies last.
Changes need to be made...
No more curbside baggage, Seven P.M. curfew
Racial profiling will continue with less bitching.
We beautified over who to kill, so until I find more relevant scripture to quote, remember our god is...
Bigger, Stronger, Smarter, and much wealthier
so wave those flags with pride, especially the white part"

We sell an addictive 24 hour candlelight vigils in TV's
Freedom will be defended at the cost of civil liberties
The viewers are glued to television screens,
STUCK ... because lots of things seem too sick
I use opportunities to pluck heart strings for theme music

I'll show you which culture to pump your fist at
"Yeah"
Which foot is right to kiss
We don't really know who the culprit is yet
"Nah"
But he looks like this
We know who the heros are
They're not the xenophobes who act hard
"We taught that dog to squat
How dare he do that shit in our own backyard"

They happened to scar our finnancial state
And char our landscape
Can you count how many times so far I ran back the same damn tape
While the cameraman creates news and shoves it down our throats on the west bank
With a ten second clip put on constant loop to provoke US angst

So get your tanks,
And load your guns,
And hold your sons in a family huddle
'Cause even if we win this tug of war,
And even the score, humanity struggles
There's a desperate need of blood for what's been uncovered under the rubble
Some of them dug for answers in the mess, but the rest were looking for trouble

Makeshift Patriot
The flag shop is out of stock
I hang myself at half-mast

Makeshift Patriot
The flag shop is out of stock
I hang myself at half-mast

Makeshift Patriot
The flag shop is out of stock
I hang myself at half-mast

It's the Makeshift, The Patriot
The flag shop is out of stock
I hang myself ... Don't waive your rights with your flags

Sage Francis- Makeshift Patriot

What the fuck can I write about without getting into Politics or Humanities

Instead of sitting all day in front the computer I decided to do something , something I don't do much and that is go outside. Yes, I went outside, The light started to burn me and my eyes went real squinty, but I made it. It is so cold outside, I made the mistake of wearing just a t-shirt, my new coat from rei, and some khakis, which don't help when you have wind speeds of 35 mph. I'm listening to my mp3 player walking along the sidewalk when I notice a guy just standing there. I wondered what the heck is he doing? Then I thought, shit ,what time is it. The time was 4:30 pm at that time everyday they play our national anthem and the japanese. AT that moment life stops, on the base and if your outside you stand still freezing you ass off. Usually I try to avoid that moment in time.
What got me out the house today other than work, was the gym, the north area gym because hell would have to freeze over if i was going to the main base area. Maybe, the north gym being closed would get me to.
Since I have no S.O.F.A. nor am I a dependent, I'm not supposed to be there. But i felt it was time for me to go. I got on one of those elliticals and ran for 40 min, then went to the bike for a cool down, all while watching Angeline Jolie kick some butt. This inspired me to go everyday, I have nothing else to do. And I seem to have a huge case of, What the fuck can I write about without getting in to politics or humanities..

Ah yes, do to my cousins, who have decided to fail their classes strict actions at home are going to be taken and everyone is affected. All tv's are gone( 4 of them), computers gone except this one. I now have rules to use the computer. Since most of our entertainment is gone we shall begin to: read (family read out-load),board games( no cranium though, sniff), and well I will be going to the gym more. I also may start learning new words, since I only have a 20 word vocabulary. Usually it consist of, "For sure."

Mr. Bot and his older brother Ben. His name is not Mr. Bot but for some reason, he calls himself that. This is one of my closest friends, well before college. I still see him often but it's not the same. He is my intelluctual conversationalist. I chat about everything with him. Yes, he looks like he's high I think so. It's not the cutest picture I have of him but it works. I spent many days in highschool sneaking out and hanging with him. I spent many nights sneaking in his house while his parents were asleep. Mostly because I couldn't go home being drunk and everything. We were great friends and still are even though we don't see each other much anymore. Everytime we are around each other it doesn't seem like anytime has has gone by. He make's me laugh a great bit, and I him. I just love chatting with him. He was a photography major in highschool and now in college he majors in English. Before i left, I went to see him and some other freinds. It was a surprise, I just showed up at his work. I felt bad though because he was going to spend that night writing a report that was due the day before. There goes his grade! Well , anyways, we spent the night at a bar somewhere in eugene. It was open mic and some of my other friends tend to take over that bar just so they can jamm out . I just want to say, Thanx Mr. Bot for always tickling me and making me laugh. I hope u find the right person someday.(21 virgin) His choice, I am proud. But please take care of yourself living that fast pace college lifestyle. I miss our conversations about nothing and everything.

Nonsense

Once i could write about anything. My mind was once on fire, i had a opinion, it has been long lost. I'm returning everyday building the fire again. The world is in dis-order and may always be a chaotic state. I mean isn't that human nature? If we all could have peace and love, that would be great. It seems there's always the exceptions and people would bore and become amused with death and destruction. I mean, I'm amused, Somehow it just makes life exciting. You must have balance of course, yin/yang not letting one side spill over thy other. Can we find this? I was always told to be a seeker never be contempt with just a answer. Learn all aspects of the Question.

Here's some Quotes: Random

"What can we know? What are we all? Poor silly half-brained things peering out at the infinite, with the aspirations of angels and the instincts of beasts. " Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

"Happiness is neither virtue nor pleasure nor this thing nor that but simply growth, We are happy when we are growing. " William Butler Yeats

"There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy." Hamlet, Prince of Denmark- William Shakespeare

"Sometimes, I feel discriminated against, but it does not make me angry. It merely astonishes me. How can any deny themselves the pleasure of my company? It's beyond me. " Zora Neale Hurston

"Man is sometimes extraordinarily, passionately, in love with suffering ... "
Fyodor Dostoevsky

"There are years that ask questions and years that answer." Zora Neale Hurston

To the duh!~ Make love not war, until

It's nice to make love, especially when your in love, but didn't baby boomer generation just cause more problems by adding to our population, spreading of std's and well, single parents. I mean come on. Half of you didn't even know who you fucked. Argh! Yeah it really sounded like a dreamy life: being strung-out, living filthy life, fight a revolution,( which wasn't important enough pass to your kids) and mass producing in your later years. The destuction of our planet. . Imao
Oh yes, I could add more but I chose not to, make it short and simple.

Shouldn't I be at work, I'm so late!

Don't tell anyone

Well let's see I come to realize that I now have no interest in anything,other than myself and someone else. I rarely talk to family and friends back home. Ii have nothing to talk about and they couldn't be doing anything different than working. I have one of the most relaxed jobs, I may ever have but I'm so tired of doing my bosses work. I've had that happen to me atleast 3 times in my career as a slacker, who only wants to play outside and read aloud. To all the customers. I am little loopy this morning, I wish the bus was running so I could go to the gym. I don't know how to drive. And am tired of being stuck on this base. I'm tired of them talking about Condoleeza Rice. Let her be! So she lied I thought all people in Politics lied? She's one hell of smart woman. A Stanford grad and child prodigy. I am not much for the Bush administration but I love when Donald Rumsfield does briefing, I admire him in a secret way( Don't tell anyone). Go Cardinals! Yes, Stanford my favorite school ever!

My friends are quite liberal, they hated when I said I probably would vote for Bush. They're still my friends :) But why would I vote for kerry, what reason did he give me to vote. I would have voted for well, Howard Dean or Kucinoch, but they wouldn't be great commanders. Imao. But it turns out I didn't vote, My ballot well never sent to me. I suppose maybe I could have got another but I really didn't want to get a ballot and decide who I would vote for. I not a bush supporter or a hater. I do like making fun of him and his administration but I would make fun of any administration. Plus i was never in town, see I worked at this camp called Camp Namanu. It's a camp that's rented for outdoor school like a science camp or something. I was a cook, but anyways. I would live there for the week, come back fridays and go back sundays. I did this for like 7 weeks until the end of the session. Remember I don't drive.Well during that time the election was going on. And since we have mail in ballots, I really didn't want to spend my 36 hrs of off time, looking how to get my ballot so I decided not to vote. Yeah, I know I didn't vote. I figured Bush would win anyways and I didn't really want to fill the bubble in for Bush. I guess maybe if Kerry won I would have been tragically sad and protested me a balck woman didn't get my ballot. sniff sniff! Well bush is prez now. I do feel he is a better commander chief than Kerry would ever be. Yes, I am a Oregonian. Not a Hippie! Even though I do associate with some. I associated with many people, I don't really like to catorgize them though.

I lost, really having a opinion a long time ago, I suppose it started when I started smoking pot. WHich was when I was 15, yeah 15, what was I thinking? Marijuana was a curiosity one I knew if I tried that it would be something I would do for awhile. I studied drugs when i was in middle school, don't ask me why, it was something I came across in the library. A book about 'drugs'. Well, anyways I looked down at people who used drugs, I thought it was silly. At that time I wanted to be in law enforcement or join the secret service(they recruit) or F.E.M.A. So all that stuff was illegal and I was like those bastard who do illegal stuff.

Well somewhere between my father getting a divorce, moving to a different area and going to highschool. My thoughts of the world changed,( poor me, sniff sniff) Lol. So no more smart kid, I became the rebel kid! And there stalled my dreams. But hey, it's made me 'today.' I defeintely still want to join F.E.M.A.( Homeland Security now). I probably will someday. The force is strong. To tell you now, you don't really need to do drugs, or sell your soul to the devil to fit in. (My soul wasn't sold) I knew if I tried any drugs it would be a problem and I decided I would have to deal with that.- Dude, athletes don't do stuff that messes with lungs. Softball rules! Like I've dreamed so much about my life, I always have Deja Vu. It's so weird! Well anyways my life is great even when it sucks, oxy-----. I'm glad I smoked pot even though I went off track a little, I have had some great conversations. I'm not a writer but superb conversationalist. One of my best strengths. Don't tell anyone but I like to be contradicting sometimes. It's fun. I know what I'm passionate about, it's just hard to explain in writing for me. Well since i have to be at work in 3 hrs I suppose i should get some sleep. Don't tell anyone but I'm wandering a little. I am still learning more about myself. And don't do drugs, don't waste you happiness! Yeah, you'll never be as happy as you once were. The dopamine levels go down and down.

"Let the wise guard their thoughts, which are difficult to perceive, extremely subtle, and wander at will. Thought which is well guarded is the bearer of happiness." Buddha

"Things said or done long years ago,
Or things I did not do or say
But thought that I might say or do,
Weigh me down, and not a day
But something is recalled,
My conscience or my vanity appalled."
William Butler Yeats

This post comes from a gifted, creepy( yes creepy),passive-aggressive person who hasn't seemed to let it click in, she will someday be great. Make the right decisions though. Keep a Smile on your face! They love my smile.

Selling of cheese.

My mind races all day and once I get home and settle, it stops. Today was a great day at work. I found out today that we had a trainee and that I would be the trainer. It's kinda of funny because I've only been working at the deli for a month now. In that month i have worked all the shifts: morning,mid and closing. My boss never comes in except to do schedules and tell me the things I need to get done, which are his duties. So now I'm in charge of checking meat and cheese times and whatever the hell else, we have to put out in our area. Let's see the trainee today was pretty cool. Other than the fact a few people new her and most of them were guys who said," Are you working tonight?" I hear that alot because my to other evening counterparts, work the same job at a different institution. Hmm, I wonder what there secret other job is?

Ok, well my favorite cheese is Tillamook cheddar cheese. It come from my humble homestate of Oregon. What a suprise it was to find out that i can go to a foreign country and find my favorite cheese. (There's also one small fact which is I live on a military base, and well you know, there tends to be a little more american products.) I sell the hell out of that cheddar cheese! It's actually like real and not so fake like american white or yellow cheese. Well, sometime I'm quite cheesy! So hope you enjoyed.

Throwing wrenches in the gears

I find this blog to be amazing and interesting. It talks about all apects of my interest. I find it astonishing that we can use so much energy and resources. What, we're like maybe 20% of the world's population and we use like half of the world's resources. It gives great points in which I haven't been able to do in awhile. Check it out! Sketchcase

I'm not a Bush supporter or hater, some of his comments aren't all of my views or beliefs.

Oh , I hate Napoleon Dynamite but it makes me laugh so much. Here's a few Quotes

Like i really don't like this movie, It has such a weak plot and the only reason it turned-out semi good is because the way Napoleon talks and dresses. And the film is set in Idaho. Which is hilarious in itself. I really don't like it though. Here's some quotes. This movie is sad.

"Is that low-fat milk you're drinking? Are u drinking that because you think you're fat? Because you're not. You could be drinking whole milk if u really wanted to." Napoleon

Kid on Bus: What are you gonna do today, Napoleon?

Napoleon : Whatever I feel like I wanna do, Gosh!

Don: Hey, Napoleon. What did you do last summer again?

Napoleon : I told you! I spent it with my uncle in Alaska hunting wolverines!

Don: Did you shoot any?

Napoleon : Yes, like 50 of 'em! They kept trying to attack my cousins, what the heck would you do in a situation like that?

Don: What kind of gun did you use?

Napoleon : A freakin' 12-gauge, what do you think?

Ghost in the Shell, a word on souls

What is a human soul, they say a soul is supposed to be a consciousness, a personality gathered together as a core in a system called "Human". Most religions believe ,approve that the presence of the soul is divine and that it is carried in you from your birth or from conception. But what if a human was first, born with a empty shells. Born to mimic: eat, sleep, walk, talk,and act just like humans. It can't be human right? That, for it to become human it needs a conscious, soul or a ghost. So how would it do that?

When I say Ghost, i mean, soul or consciousness.

The movie
Is set in the future, were the world is dominated by advanced computers and cyberoptic technology. Which then forth creates a vast breeding ground for criminals. Where heightened humas live in a virtual environment. ( Heightened humans: The accessing from a brain, through a human or cyberoptic body, who still has part of a human brain). Can be connected to the net.
It talks about life's basic question? What it means to be human, and what "life" is. It talks about the concept of "soul". Right and wrong and and the fusion of science and religion. This movie is deeper than you would think. And I can't explain all the philosphical notations, in the movie. If anybody hasnt't seen Ghost in the Shell . Well go see it. Check it out!

Are we all born with souls? How do you know? I'll write another post on more ideas and theories about this, not talking about the movie.

My first

Well, hmm, I'm sitting here cotemplating what i should write. This is my first blog. I feel nothin at the moment I used to think about my best friend all day everyday, but not anymore. So what happened well I dont know ,but it's been a long strange friendship. Especially in the last 2 years, nothing is going on between us. Just akward behavior,slight jealousy and even temptation. We're so growing apart.It just happens, that's life right? But I've become so frustrated.

What a year it's been, turned 21, was a drunk apr-jun . Well only on the weekends, not to much . I tend to not like being around kids in a alterd state(hangover). But what a life, live in the woods, be a cook and be around kids, attend camp fire and be goofy.Free room and board, never in the city. What a life. Especially catching fresh salmon, on the Sandy river. Mmmmm. My favorite fish!

Then chapter 2 of 2004

My great adventure in Jackson Hole, Wyoming. A superb place,well the park, not the tourist, but jackson the city was cool, Especially going back there when ur 21. Working at the resort sucked sometime 'cause everything closes early. But my co-worker were awesome, had great converstion with people from so many backgrounds.A good place to study social interactions. I love the Tetons! And Snake river breweries, There special drink The Discombobulator taste so good but they only sell it for 2 months. That sucks. It was cool though.

Let's see i live on a lake which was frezzing cold most of the time, but kayaking and stuff was free for the staff. I saw a cub which was awesome, like the only animal i didn't see the summer before. But this cub was real close to me i wasn't to scared, probably should of been. I wish I had a camera.the reason i wasn't to scared was, i could walk to my dorm and be safe. I'd say when i was 10 ft from a moose and it's calf i was freaked out, that was the summer before though. A long story and great traveling.

The only places I've ever been in my life has been Great Wyoming and Montana(GlacierPark), and a few other non-importants(all important, don't wanna list) . I then fell in love with Missoula,Montana. A place i would love to live for schooling purposes, they have a great Geography department, not to bad at all. Well most of ya don't know i wanna be a Geographer or a Kinseologist.

Around August i came back and worked at Camp Namanu again, not going to say much the fall session was great but my new boss. Was real lazy and i did everything. So they got paid more while i did ther job. Well now i have more experince so good for me. I skipped a lot but let's just say Highlights. ANd now snowy, crazy , Northern Japan. Probably the safest place I've been well other than the forest. It's do to fact I live on a Air Force Base. Which i like but can't go anywhere because i have no S.O.F.A. But i sure can work. I'm boring, maybe my next post could be more exciting. An maybe talk about something meaningful in the world. Or some crazy idea I have. My writing is terrible i need to learn how to express myself better. Sorry for my lacking, I should be mad at myself about it though.

A bore

It's so cold here, I've never in snow but it's cool. Except we get wind warnig like everyday and wind and snow sucks hard core. I love good thing i got snow boots, we have like 2 ft. of snow and more comes down everyday. Sometime it melts in the day,but when u awake the next like 6 more inches is on the ground. I take fresh poweder anyday than having ice on the ground. WEll gotta go wo work. Ahh yes, here's a important question. Should i visit South korea or the Philipine? I need to go out of the coutry so i can get a new visa. Korea is the closest but gee, the Philipines come on now. Just comment. I can't decide for myselve

Hail to the Hippie May Someday You Be Hip!!!

"I smoke two joints in the morning
I smoke two joint at night
I smoke two joint in the afternoon
It makes me feel all right
I smoke two joints in time of peace
And two in time of war
I smoke two joints before I smoke two joints,
And then I smoke two more "

Song by Bradley from Sublime